Ghetto DBZ
by PompusRompus
Summary: This is the ghetto version of Dragon Ball Z. Chapters are based off of Ghetto cartoon videos and from my mind. Enjoy.
1. Loose Lips Sink Ships

This is from a ghetto Arthur episode by CareyBoy132. At least that's what it says on the video. Someone called Fire assassin uploaded the video and it's called **Ghetto Arthur 😂😂 Episode 1**.

* * *

Vegeta was just walking down the road when Bulma came riding down her bike down the road. While riding past him, she rode into a puddle of rain, splashing the prince with the dirty water.

"Watch where you goin', my nigga!" she called back, not even attempting to apologize for getting the prince wet.

Vegeta turned to the "camera". "You see the thing about Bulma is that she want the dick. But she's over here actin' like she don't. I know she wants some of this dick. Lemme tell ya'll about this one time..."

 **FLASHBACK**

 _It was Vegeta's first day of school. He would rather be outside training to become stronger, but instead he had to go to earth school. Stupid asteroid just had to blow up his planet, didn't it?* He didn't know anyone there and the few saiyans he did know were older than him. There weren't any his age which was stupid. His mother decided that it would be a good idea to introduce him to a human girl._

 _"Vegeta, this is Bulma." she said. "She's our new neighbor."_

 _Vegeta was about to respond with something nasty when she licked her lollipop and slapped it on his forehead, smirking after doing so._

 **END FLASHBACK**

"And ever since she laid that on me, I knew it was destiny to find out what that mouth could do." finished the prince.

"Ay lil nigga! Quit talkin' to that gnome and get your ass to school!" shouted Roshi out of his window.

"Fuck you!" The prince shouted back although he was clearly embarrassed he had been caught talking to nobody again. He hurried off to school not wanting to be late for class.

When he arrived, he was just about to go up the stairs to go inside when he heard Bulma calling his name. Turning to face her, he saw her looking pissed along with her friends Chichi and Lunch. What was she so mad about?

"So you just out here tellin' niggas I'm suckin' your wee-wee?" she questioned. Vegeta didn't know what to say. He wasn't going to confess he was bragging about it to his friends. Speaking of which, which one of those bastards told? His friends knew what would happen if they opened up their mouth about shit that was supposed to stay in the group. Then Goku of all people came up and squealed on himself **_and_ ** him.

"Yeah! You don't remember?" asked Goku. "Ain't that the loose necked nigga that was suckin' yo dick?"

Bulma marched over to the prince. "First off I ain't no nigga! I'm a female!"

With that Bulma went inside, steaming, with her friends behind her, throwing the saiyan nasty looks as they walked past him. When they had went inside, Vegeta gave Goku a nasty look himself before going inside to get his things out of his locker and get to class.

* * *

"This is all your fault!" Vegeta said to Goku as they worked on Math problems in class.

" **My** fault?" said Goku rolled his eyes. " _You're_ the one who wanted a nigga bitch to suck yo dick and bragged about it!"

"Yeah, but you didn't have to run your fucking mouth, you...!" their conversation was interrupted by a paper airplane twirling around before it hit Vegeta on the nose. He opened it up and read it.

 _ **If you tell anybody I sucked your dick again...**_

Here Goku grabbed the paper and read the rest of it.

 _ **...I'mma turn you and Carrot boy's booties to raw meat.**_

Both saiyans gulped and dared to look over at the girl's desks where they were sitting. All of them were giving them death stares with Chichi tapping her desk with her ruler in a threatening manner, almost to say that if they tried anything else like that, she was going to beat them to death with it. Lunch was cracking her knuckles and Bulma snapped a pencil in half.

'Note to self: Be careful what kind of niggas you open your mouth around.' thought Vegeta. 'Also whoop Kakarott's ass later.'

* * *

*The reason I said asteroid was because if I'm remembering correctly for the longest time everyone (including Vegeta) thought the planet was destroyed by an asteroid until Frieza revealed to Vegeta on Namek he did it. Wait if Vegeta knew his father got his ass whooped, how come had no clue about his planet being destroyed!?


	2. How to Eat the Booty Like Groceries

This is from a ghetto Arthur episode by ITSREAL85.

* * *

King Vegeta and his wife were frantically searching their house for their "How to Eat Ass" book. Neither could remember where they had left the thing and were trying to find it before anybody other than them found it. They'd die of embarrassment if anybody else found it, so they had to find it fast.

"How the hell did you loose the 'How to Eat Ass' book?" King Vegeta asked as he looked under the couch.

"I know I put it in the house somewhere." said his wife.

"Bitch, you'd better find it!" he said picking up a teddy bear out of the couch. Just then their youngest son walked in.

"Hey that's mine!" he grabbed it from his father and ran off.

"We have to find that book before the kids find it!" said his wife looking in the bookcase.

"You better hope we do."

Meanwhile Vegeta was going outside with his stack of books to return them. Unknown to him and his parents, Vegeta had accidentally picked up their missing book and was making his way to the library with it. On his way, 18 was riding her bike beside him.

"Ol' geek squad ass nigga." she said stopping. "Where are you going with all those books?"

"I'm about to return all these books back. Why? You gonna give your boy a ride?" asked Vegeta hopefully. He didn't want to fly least he dropped them or he flew so fast the papers would come loose from the book. If 18 gave him a ride there, it'd be faster than walking there.

"You got some gas money?"she asked. What the hell did she need...ooooh. Right.

"Well no I don't have any right now, but I get you later."

"Fuck outta here, you bum ass nigga!" said 18 as she took off on her bike.

"Bitch!" yelled Vegeta as he watched her go down the street.

* * *

"Where the hell is it?!" yelled Yajirobe while in the library.

"Where's what?" yelled back the librarian.

"The food books!"

"In the back now shut the hell up!" she called back. "This is a library not a gym!"

Yajirobe took off for the back of the library towards the cook books, bumping into Vegeta in the process. The prince, not having seen the older male until it was too late, tumbled back into the cart behind him and fell over with his stacks of books.

"Damn!" said Vegeta rubbing the back of his head as he got up. "Ol' whale blubber back ass nigga! Watch where you're going!"

As he went behind the cart to gather up his things, he found a book with the word "Private" written in various languages across the cover of it. What did he have here? As he looked through the book, he found a lot of intriguing things in there that he couldn't keep to himself. He rounded up his friends and showed them what he had found inside of it.

* * *

Queen Vegeta had just arrived from a trip to the grocery store when she noticed something about her oldest son and his friends. They were all covered in what looked like mud. However on closer inspection, her child and friends smelled like they had been rolling around in shit. She had never quite gotten accustomed to Earth and its various cultures so she didn't know if this was something humans did or some weird trend going on that she was happy to not know about.

"Hey, your majesty!" Goku was the first to greet her. "Vegeta found this weird book and it was telling us to do this weird shit so we ate..."

"We ate each other's booties!" finished Bulma. "I ate Goku's!"

"And I ate Vegeta's!" said Krillin. "Does that make him gay or me? Whose gay?"

"Mother, can I ask you something?" said Vegeta. "Do you...eat shit?"

"What?" she asked confused.

"The book had your name in it." At that moment she knew that her son had found their book. Shit!

"You're a shit eater!" said Goku.

"N-no! That ain't true!" she stammered. "I-I don't what y-you're talking about! Do you uh still have that book?"

"Yeah. It's right..." As soon as he held it up, his mother snatched it up from her and took off into the house.


	3. Makeover and Parent-Teacher Conference

ITREAL85 again and it's ghetto Arthur again. Next up Ghetto Ninja Turtles by the same person.

* * *

"So we smokin' weed later or not?" Bulma asked Piccolo.

"I got some reggies." said Piccolo.

"Nigga, you ain't got none of that..."

"Hey, hey!" said Toma hitting his desk with a ruler. "Ya'll shut the fuck up in here! I ain't yo mama or your daddy! I'll slap the shit outta one of you little niggas!"

"Hold on fool!" said Chichi. "My daddy said ain't no man supposed to curse at me."

"Little girl, fuck you and yo daddy!" said Toma not giving a fuck. As if a mere human could do anything to him. "Don't make me have to call my squad up here to come whoop your mother fuckin' ass. Now sit yo little dumb ass dumb, bitch!"

"Oooh!" said Piccolo from the back of the classroom. Chichi gave him the finger.

* * *

After class, Chichi, Lunch, and 18 were in the bathroom talking, fixing up their hair, and putting on makeup. "Damn girl, what kind of makeup is that?" asked Lunch as she brushed her hair. "It looks good on you."

"Maybe its Maybelle, maybe it's not." said Chichi as she put away her mascara. "Get your own swag."

Just then Bulma walked into the bathroom looking dirty. She had just come from outside from an intense soccer game and was coming in to wash up. "Hey, what's good with ya'll? Ya'll just coolin it in here? I need to wash my hands. Excuse me."

They all just stared at her as she went over to the sink beside Chichi and washed the dirt off of her hands. To their horror, the water had turned a dark black. Geez, how dirty was this bitch? Chichi couldn't resist the urge to crack a few jokes at her friend's expense. "Do you give oil changes?"

"Uh no why?"

"That water was black! What'd you do? Give a coke machine a handjob?" 18 and Lunch snickered as Chichi then began to brush her friend's hair. "What's this shit? A pit-bull mixed with a German Shepard? Girl you need a titanium brush to go through this shit."

"Ow!" Bbulma cried out just as Chichi got her hairbrush stuck in her curly blue hair.

"Forget a brush! We need a cross and some holy water!" said Chichi. "That shit's possessed! Who's your beautician? Stevie Wonder?"

"Get her!" said 18.

"Where the fuck your edges?" asked Chichi.

"Get her!" said 18 laughing even harder along with Lunch.

"My daddy does my hair." said Bulma as she untangled her hair from the brush. Her father always thought spending money on a hairdresser was garbage so he did it Even though he could afford it being a billionaire and all, for some strange reason he had something against hairstylists.

"Girl, what you need is a makeover." said Chichi shaking her head. "I'll stop by your house after school and do it then."

When Chichi arrived at Bulma's house, the first place they went was to the taller woman's closet. She rummaged through her closet for something sexy the blue haired woman could wear to school tomorrow. After a bit of searching, she pulled out a small pink dress for Lunch to wear. "'There you go. This'll do."

"But this is my little sister's dress."

"So? The tighter the better. Don't you want guys lookin' at you? Let them ass cheeks breath a little. Now go on and try it on. Afterwards I'm gonna work on your hair."

* * *

THE NEXT DAY

Goku and Vegeta were running up the hallway kicking a ball of paper. Chichi pointed the two males out and they headed their way.

"I coulda went pro, nigga!" said Goku. "I coulda went pro!"

"Move mother fucker!" said Vegeta nudging his friend. The ball landed at the girls' feet and Chichi smashed the ball with her foot which the two didn't take too kindly too.

"Hey you heavy footed bitch!" said Goku.

"Yeah, who the fuck you think you are?" asked Vegeta.

Then they saw what kind of mess was on Bulma's head. "Gah!"

"Ya'll like my new style?" she asked fluffing her hair. How she didn't notice the look of horror on their faces was beyond anybody watching.

"Who the hell are you?" asked Goku. She looked familiar, but he couldn't place who she was.

"It's Bulma, fool!" she turned to Vegeta hoping for a compliment from him.

"The fuck you look like that?" asked Vegeta. She looked stupid with that hideous afro on her head. Who the hell did she think she was? Hercule?

"She got a make over." informed Chichi with her hands on her hips. Both males fell over laughing. She scowled at the two and grabbed Bulma's arm. "Come on, girl. Let's get outta here."

"Bitch hair look like somebody grandpa and shit!" laughed Vegeta slapping his knee.

* * *

At lunch time, Bulma was enjoying a hamburger just as Goku and Raditz were in the lunchroom walking to their table. Goku snickered when he saw Bulma with her friends. "You see that bitch over there...oh shit!"

One of the pins in Bulma's afro escaped and nearly hit Goku. Luckily he had managed to duck before it hit him. He turned to his brother. "Damn that bitch's falling apart, nigga, ol' silverback in the face ass bitch."

"That looks like a ratcheted teddy graham, nigga." The two brothers laughed.

"That's it!" Bulma stood, clinching a bottle of ketchup.

"Bitch I wish you would!" said Goku. Chichi attempted to get her to sit down when Bulma accidentally squeezed too hard and ketchup spilled on her dress. Both laughed at her and went on their way.

* * *

"I think having ice cream at the parent teacher conference was a very good idea." said Dr. Gero who was talking with Toma while 18 was looking nervous. She was hoping Toma would just say she was doing good in class and they could move onto a class where she wasn't cheating in to pass and could easily answer a question if asked. "So how's my daughter been doing? Has she been listening? Has she been learning anything new?"

"Yeah, we're learning a lot in math." said Toma. "What's 3 + 3?"

"Uh...um...72?" she said hoping she was right.

"You little stupid mother fucker." frowned Toma. "When the hell has that ever been the answer? We're gonna have to get her some study hall. In front of your daddy. Really bitch?"


End file.
